FairyButterflyButton-moonedCupcakedGirl

My productiveness is at an all time high at the moment. I think this is partly fuelled by having a job I enjoy going to. Not just because the people are brilliant but because I am freely allowed to merchandise and my idea’s on how retail can be successful are taken seriously. Plus I get a great discount on crafty products.

Which leads me onto my craftyness. I’ve never considered myself a crafter, but I think i probably hold the title well. I’m currently working on a number of projects. I’m making a dress from some old curtains, a toy cat for dave, a rug that I found on a car boot for £1, 2x cross stitch patterns, some jewelery tree’s and I’m also working on some scrapbooks for xmas.

I’ve taken this productivity into my housework as well. Although the house always has some kind of mess, I’ve started to periodically put things away. For example, I will finish some of a project, then put three items away in a drawer. It is a slow process, but it does mean I can see how my tidying makes a differance and this also allows me to spread over several rooms, instead of concentrating on one. I had hoped Dave would pick up on this, but he seems to concentrate on one thing at a time. Which is actually fine, as he’s doing things like makes the house totally wireless, so we don’t have cables anywhere. He changed the living room around which was brilliant, and helps the tv to have no glare, and the plants have more light.

We’ve been talking about painting the rooms as of late, which is exciting. No matter how long we are at the house for, it would be nice to have some colour.

*Back to work.

Yep, today I was feeling pretty average. Had a productive evening, last night making a roast dinner, which I haven’t done in a while. And making sure David didn’t have anything to do as he was hungover, and that’s never a pleasant thing to witness.

So off I trolleyed to work this morning, lunch made, hair straightened, all jolly. Then I got stuck just as I turn off bury new road behind a stupid bint doing 20mph in rush hour! I was 2mins late to work. Which has been bumbling along. Then I got my lunch break and read the metro, which everyday proceeds to tell me how poor I am, that the country is going to the dogs, and the bank are going to screw me over at some point.

WOW, I did not know that. *Sarcasium added and not optional.

So to put t bluntly, I wish the metro’s journalists would go throw themselves off the nearest bridge. I’m glad I work where I do at the moment, Because at least I can go back to work and be inspired by other crafty people.

With the economy the way it is at the moment, here in the UK. We seem to have warped back in time and become truely thrifty. My idea of thrift was originally buying something from a charity shop that has been floating around for 30years. Yes this is thrift. But its not a thrifty life.

I’m working in an Arts and craft shop, which I feel is one of the best places to be at the moment. I’ve been here two weeks and already have started and completed three craft projects. I don’t think I’ll ever get to the level of the Lois/Harriet household, as they have a world of creativity buzzing around their home, and whilst Dave is creative, I doubt I’ll ever see the day when he’s crouched over my sewing machine. I actually think having to watch what you spend more closly is a great thing to happen in the long run. As It’s opened my eyes to just how spoilt we are in the western world.

Normally we’d go to Tesco and buy whatever we wanted, at whatever cost. Now we actually have to say, we can’t afford that. Let’s buy the cheaper or do without. Dave had the clever idea of us growing our own veg, which is very exciting for me, as my palette is becoming more varied day by day. And I’d love to be able to just pick the vegetables and be able to taste them without a care, like they do on River Cottage.  So Dave’s made a bed out of recycled timber, and put the compost down. All we need now is the seeds and were away We already have strawberry plants coming into full grown, they were planted this time last year though.

The garden is still quite a mess, we have both been working hard to try and made it look nicer, and become habitable for when we purchase chickens. I’ve weeded the patio and am making headway on the borders, and Dave is in charge of mowing and generally looking manly.

Another area that has become totally thrifty is my shopping habits. I love shopping, I love touching all the different textures, the displays, the smells etc etc. This….has all stopped.

Stopped. I haven’t bought a new piece of clothing now for three months. Part of me is sad, part of me is very proud. Instead of buying anything, I have been customising my own clothes and have dusted off my sewing machine to start making my own clothes. Something my Mum and Nana did in the 60’s. My Mum has given me her two year stash of Prima magazine, meaning I have patterns galore to play with! I hope when I have mastered many crafts, I can come up with some sort of temporary store to sell some things. It will bring in extra income and also help me to de-clutter regulary. With all this in mind, I have decided to have a crafty christmas. By this I mean that I will be making most if not all of my friends and families presents. Again another reason thrify living works! You can tailor your crafting to the individual, so they should love it. (fingers crossed).

*rushes back to work*

If you know me, then you should know by now I don’t use products testing on animals. I am totally against real fur, and am now trying to eat totally free range.

Whilst I don’t agree with the extremism of groups such as PETA and the group against Huntington life sciences, I do think they are some of the only people that are actually trying to stop unnecessary suffering where our furry friends are concerned.

Ok, so it took some time, but I do actually agree with those of you who think we should test on animals to further medical research, such as new treatments for cancer etc. But why should the animal be in pain whilst we are doing this? There are now hundreds of human testing centers, great! Do they skimp on the sedatives? Of course not, because in the natural order of things we are greater than any animal. So with this in the scientists minds, they don’t invest in proper or enough sedatives, and so the animals are in pain when they are going through these processes. All to save us.

It is torture in a way, and with the many synthetics now available should not be happening. But with global corporations such as L’Oreal not playing the game, why should the other companies bother? And it isn’t just cosmetics I have to watch. Boycotting animal tested products is a daily and consuming process. I have to research new companies, sometimes emailing them to ask if their centers abroad test. As it is now illgal in the European Union, but not outside it.

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Please watch the video. Yes it is a shock tactic, this seems to be the only way to get through to all those blind eyes though, doesn’t it? I’m not going to preach about how right or wrong your buying habits are. This is mearly a one way conversation about my own buying habits and the video about is one of the reasons.

I’m not just an animal hugger though. With all the undercover programmes exposing the major high st fashion retailers as exploiting the poor, I’m really having to re-think my what goes into my wardrobe. With all the alternatives the same stores are starting to offer being so expensive, I’m starting to turn to vintage and independent indie designers for my clothes. Yes it is a long process, but one I hope to have mastered within the next two years.

As for food, well that will take considerable longer. I would love to eat purely free-range foods, at the moment thought it’s not affordable.  Yes I am buying free range roast chickens, but what about the fillets? pork, beef, lamb, was that treated and killed ethically? This is a longer journey, one that makes me proud. And in turn I hope that David and any family we one day create will embrace this way of life too. Not as crazy, mixed up hippies. But as another way of living. A normal way. Just as we recycle now without a care, it has become second nature. And lets us contribute to cleaning up the earth, just a little.

To thoese who disagree with me because of pricing pressure, or just an ignorant of animals being more than the lower of the species. That’s fine, you’ve made your choice and I’m not going to question it. So I can only hope readers old and new do not discriminate against this blog either.

So I have been trying lately to tap back into my creative side. I am a scatty thing so there are lots of things I want to do. On the recent bank holiday weekend me & Dave got the paints, and canvas out and went about creating some pollock style paintings to dress the empty/artless walls in our house. Dave did a brown and red background, then gave up and went to be ill elsewhere. I on the other hand painted my canvas a bright blue and then began to splatter an array of colour everywhere. I thought it looked crap so I decided to rub over some of it which left a pretty mushed up streak. So I did this all over and the end result is brilliant, I think I’m going to hang it in the hall with the other pieces of art we’ve bought.

I’ve also dusted the sewing machine off and am currently re-constructing a floral dress I found in a charity shop. It still needs a lot of work, but hopefully I can sell it on fashionspace when I’m done and make some pennies. I think that poetry, or at least visual poetry is the way forward for me. Visual poetry is where you visualise your poem. This could be in a man made collage, or photography, video or if your really smart a mixture of all. My brain is pushing so many words and images around at the moment, its very hard to keep up.

I’m getting back into following music artists again, planning gigs and buying or downloading albums. I’ve recently heard some of Serj Tankian’s solo music. My, oh my, the poetic genuis that is political messages not forced or contrived but shared melt off his tongue and onto the most beautiful minor notes. Also loving Jimmy Eat World’s new album. Once again they have got friendly, come indoors for a piece of cherry pie emo rock down to a tee.

Listening to motivating music makes me want to get my keyboard out and give it a good thrashing. Maybe I could start piano lessons when I’ve sorted some pennies aside for creative interests.

Hopefully sometime when the rain moves on, me and David are going to do a car boot, and get rid of a lot of unwanted things.  The house is very cluttered at the moment, and whislt it isn’t the tidyest house in the world, it’s still home. And I like the slight disfunction that comes with me and Dave deciding things belong in a different place. Speaking of which, I’m going to do some sorting before Sweeney Todd is on at 9pm. Something to absorb, which is always a joy.

Anyone who does not like a distraction from life, is lying.

• (check)Find a Manchester boy
• (check)Get a job in Afflecks
• (check)Move out of Golborne
• (check)Work in a High Fashion store
• (check)Go to Uni
• (check)Go to Europe
• (check)See Ash, Blink 182, Foo Fighters and JJ72 live
• (check)Work for Topshop
• Work for a Fashion Magazine
• (check)Move in with Manchester Boy

I don’t have a title for this blog. Just a general update on what’s been going on really.

Well after 9 days I got a new job. I’m just five days into training and already pondering what it will hold. There is A LOT to learn. We spent the whole day, learning how to use the back up system, known as AS400 on the second day! I think it will be a system I need to get the hang of, but once I do it will become second nature. I’ve decided I am going back to Uni. I’m looking forward to being absorbed in Biology and hopefully taking a foundation to get onto the degree I want. But i really do need to start planning, getting in touch with UCAS, the SLC etc etc.One of the great things about going back to Uni will be going through the experience with one of my best friends Danny. He’s my rock and will be there to leen on no doubt. There is a placement year on our courses where I’m sure we’ll seperate. I hope David will take a year out and come with me but we’ll have to see. All I know is I’ll get to study animals in a different country for a year! Some of the following on my mind are:

• Studying Wolves in Canada
• Panda’s in China/Japan
• Dolphins in Fiji
• Brown Bears in Canada/Americas

Any of those would be fantastic. And if I get that far, I will be very proud. For now though, I must concentrate on getting back into education,and trying to get some much needed funding as a mature student.
My weight has dropped again. Which is a bit strange as I thought I was gaining weight. I bought some smart black pants in a size 12 and they are huge! As are a lot of my clothes. Needless to say,  apart from ”those” fat days, I am now a size 10, even an 8 in some stores *gulp.

Yesterday I sorted through the junk in my room for hours. I’m still not done but I’m getting there. I got some second hand pink paint yesterday. And I am planning on doing some sort of design on one of the walls. Hanging the array of art/pictures I have and creating more of a guest room/haven. I was going to sell my desk, but if I do go back into education full time, I’m going to need that.

It’s had it’s highs and it’s defiantly had it’s lows!

Firstly, a member of my family, Gonzo died on Sunday. he was ran over by ‘Magnum Whiteline’ taxi’s. Based in Prestwich the driver killed him and then drove back past after dropping off passengers! In shock I called them and no one was owning up to it.

I hope they are consumed with guilt.

My Birthday wasn’t the best in the world, more of a repeat of last year. Only Dave, and our immediate family sent cards. Not one friend. Which is a little disheartening, as I spend so bloody much on people! And no, I can’t just stop. I get immense plesure out of making someone happy. Maybe I’m selfish.

There is some joy though, David seemed to be a little happier and I’m trying my best to make the house better. I’m not feeling so good at the moment, but with the most beautiful art I have seen in a long while being shown at the RG gallery on Thomas St in town, I can’t not accompany Dave to town today.

So off to the shower with me, I can only hope next week is much more easier to bear.

Last night, whilst drifting off to sleep, lady nature decided to wake everyone up with a shake, rattle and roll. Or in other words an earthquake, which is flippin’ rare in England and something that deserves a blogging.

At first I thought it was a strong wind, but the whole bed shook so winds were clearly not to blame and busy bothering some sailors in a far off sea. I only felt a tremor and it woke me up so I hope the people in Barnsley where it hit are ok, according to recent news reports only one man is injured.

In other news, I can’t quite seem to shake off bits of my past. Maybe it’s because people and places that reside in my past are seemingly moving on, and I am going nowhere at the moment. Hopefully when I start my career and the move to a different country becomes apparent, I’ll start to feel better.  Stil, there’s a lingering sense of ‘am I good enough?’ in every part of my life, and it’s starting to piss me off. As well my mind being mushed up, work have decided to trial a new program on our computer system. Which is suppose to make life easier. It’s had the opposite effect and has given me the extra kick to try and leave.

After talking to some ’senior ladies on my team, I have a whole new prospective regarding my manager. I never saw things from her pov. And after realising that she isn’t the devil incarnet, I’ve decided to just get on with it and try to be nice. Afterall what harm comes from being nice to someone? Not a lot, I hope.

There’s been some progress on my room. I’ve been seriously depressed lately, and I think having crap lying around everywhere is not helping. So now that I don’t have my own computer and I’ve temporarily lost Dave to Eve *the game. I scrubbed the floor with the Hoover, took my keyboard out of storage and am setting up my sewing machine this week. So hopefully I can get going and make some cushions and clothing to sell or wear. For the meantime though, I must pop off and apply for jobs.

And how. Not purchased, no. But darn the new NS album sounds delicious. Long have I had a love for Matthew C & co, and they never sees to amaze me. Lucky, the new album looks low-key in their arty, earthy ways. And although I’ve only heard the first two tracks, they have once again brought me to life.

That’s one of the reaons I love Nada Surf so much. Their a band that’s always there. When I’m down, when I’m high, I love them and will never let go. Unlike my JJ obsession, ND seem to share my poetic outlook on life, unlike me they also possess a gift which allows them to put it in song.

Besides getting all hysterical over pretty americans, I booked an emergency appointment today at the doctors, after doubling over in pain at the end of my shift. Maybe my stomach sensed my manager’s imminent return, or maybe it’s a bit bent.

Either way, my doctor prescribed 6 boxes of puke-coloured mixture I must gulp down to avoid the pains in my gut. What if I don’t down it? I have to go to hospital *shudders*.  Lately I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching, or rather finding. Nope, I haven’t found anything yet, which is why i’m so blue at the moment. That and the overwhelming pit of laziness I just can’t drag myself out of. There’s so much i’d love to do, paint, film, compose, sing. But it all seems so far out of my reach. When compared to morgages, bills and maintaining the car, to drive to work, to pay for the car, that drives me to work (yes, I’m a ‘The Tiny’ fan).

Part of my new outlook is not only to de-crap my life by getting rid of old stuff, but also by continuely assessing my relationships with people. A lot of people let me down last year. A lot of people walked over me, some for the first time, and some for the last time. So if you need that last penny for your cup o tea….sorry I can no longer help you. If you want me to support you but you decide to ‘not be avaliable’ for the favor.

Turn round, and walk the other way. Don’t come back and fuck me over. I’m ill and tired and simply can’t be bothered with half arsed antics anymore. Speaking of which, my sister has been upto no good again, along with the help of her ex. I wish she’d give my mum a fucking break. I feel so sorry for her, but at the same time, I can’t really do much.

Gloves. Still needing them and loving it. I like the cold. I can bear it, I can look nice and I have a lot of wintery clothes. But spring is finally dawning, which is my favorite season. It’s still quite cold but green and yellows emerge and bunnies come out to play Horrar for easter. Most likely my baking trend will continue into easter. It’s tiring but extremely satifying.

”The way to a man’s heart, IS through his stomach”. Well that’s one way. So apart from wanting to run away to Paris, adore the Surf and throw my inhibitions to the wind, the theme park season is vastly approaching. Which means more time with the ATAers and the only parties I go to, well the best ones. A holiday abroad again with friends would be something to treasure. I don’t know where I’d fit it in though. What with, fishing with my dad, going away for Dave’s grandad’s birthday and planning a trip to Canada and Germany. It will hopefully be a busy and happy year.